“kyle is really smart though, and most of the time i think he...”
— Sandy, thank you so much.

“The legitimate powers of government extend to such acts only...”
— Paraphrasing Thomas Jefferson

Welcome Back

Irregularly scheduled posting on this tumblr blog will commense now.

Sorry Tumblrs :(

Don’t unfollow me. I’m coming back soon.

Oyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Tumblr, I am so sorry. I am here for you now. I want to sooth and god I don’t even know. I...

Riptide 2.0, my new gig

The completed mural outside Sweat Records Miami. Click here...

I saw the ad for these on Gawker, and thought for sure it...

Today marks the 4th anniversary of my last.fm usage. Here...

“US fragrance manufacturer Parlux will launch Fancy, the...”
— -Cosmetics News Obvious...

Number of times I’ve pumped my fist after an Olympic win this week: 0 Number of times...

Sophia Lamar’s make up wipes as art. This of course is...

1. Woah. Woah. Woah. Sia is dating JD Samson? Guess so, but...

Is it way too soon to post this picture or way too late?

“The Rolling Stones interviewed The Jonas Brothers and put...”
—  Jimmy Tisdale, my new...

Sometimes there’s so much beauty in the world I feel...

It had been a while since I had a home cooked meal.

Sleeper Hit

You know that upcoming film The Rocker? The one that seems like the writer had Jack Black in mind...

May your hot buttered soul find peace in Scientology heavan.

Sometimes (sadly?) this would be an appropriate theme song...

Sometimes I get into a mood where I just want to listen to...

If my Dad and Little Sister Edited a...

I heard rumors that Rolling Stone used to be something of a  respected music magazine years and...

Here is what makes Suspiria so great: the style and the...

Continuing The Vague Theme Of Celebrity...

How long has Gwen Stefani been pregnant? I think it’s been forever. Hasn’t it been...

Entertainment Tonight: Blah Blah Blah Brangelina Blah Blah Blah
Mom: I hate them
Me: Why?
Mom: Because they're so perfect. Hate them. Fucking hate them.

Cry Me A Desert

Sometimes I am amazed at my inablity to cry, and I don’t mean that in any sort of bullshit...

Humor Crises

Either I am not funny anymore or there is nothing inspiring me to be funny right now. Well, I guess...

Who Will Find Themselves Atop Best Album...

Every year someone says “Jeez, it just hasn’t been a very good year for music”. A...

Cuil is a new search engine that launched yesterday....

Could I Really Vote For a Republican

An interesting tidbit: My representative in the House is Ileana Ros-Lehtinen who’s a nice...

While we’re on the subject, The Emperor Machine has...

Listen

Listen

Oh No They Didn’t will always be my choice for bottom of the barrel celebrity news, if only for the...

I Need To Feel The Rain On My Skin

Is it an indication that I’m at some sort of low point in my life (a post-graduate crisis to...

MTV Remaking The Rocky Horror Picture Show

Project Runway Cast Romance?!

Still from TM Sisters’ “Things Will End Before...

Which one is more a victim of fashion: the clueless fug with...

R.I.P. Estelle Getty.

(via alexbalk) I got into Throbbing Gristle about the same...

“Republicans believe the campaign can’t focus on McCain...”
— Some one at Salon paraphrasing...

I can’t keep up the “Oh, I’m from Florida....

For what may be the last few weeks of my time in this town...

I get all the girls, I get all the girls

I like them black girls I like them white girls I like them Asian girls I like them mixed race girls...

Everyone was complaining so loudly about The Wire getting...

No reason for this.

"The thought of busting Batman makes me...

The writers of the current Batman Movie series say they’re not interested in rebooting anymore...

Scientists find bugs that eat waste and...

Things On The Internet That Won't Go...

I didn’t want to comment on these things, but they are obviously all v. v. important and need...

Listen

“I won’t be quitting the fags because it’s who I...”
— Kate Moss Are you listening...

“Overall, not a complete hot tranny mess, but definitely not...”
— Radar Online’s review of...

What better way for the gayest show in history to finish its...

Bologna bandit strikes west side Stripes

This is old, but excuse me if I don’t check Hel-Looks...

Hayden Panettiere First Single Is A Paris...

It never occured to me that it was a pun. I hate cheap puns,...

All the Sad Young Cool Kids

Never. Ever. Ever. Write a cover letter for a job at 4am, and hit send. Save it, sleep on it....

See, there was a day where I could eat Burger King with out...

“Jesus Christ Kyle, let’s find that fucking ointment.”
— I just said this aloud to...

Project Runway is now like one of your best friends who you...

A collection of LiveJournal Icons featuring model Masha...

I woke up this morning unexpectedly hung over, with no food...

Racist, misogynist assasins shouldn't...

If Obama was to pick a lady Vice President (if the Kathleen Sebelius or even Hillary Clinton murmers...

Band Aids designed by Alexandre Herchcovitch. Can’t...

Happy Birthday to Jackie. Someone brought their little...

I cannot use a George Foreman Grill and...

Apparently you’re supposed to put something underneath it to collect the fat juice, which I...

I am using a George Foreman grill for...

I don’t know why that is fascinating.

“Hey have you seen youtube.com? I’m watching Oprah....”
—  Mom. She’s not the most...

Strangers need to stop randomly IMing me while they’re...

Fashionably late to the internet meme.

Unpacking the Groceries

Me: You're buying generic brand tampons?
Mom: Yeah, moneys tight.
Me: Things are bad.
Mom: Yeah, they're really bad.

Not Good

Of course I have to come back home to Naples for my bithday, and of course President Bush has to...

Another in my series of photos of semi-random, fabulous...

Karl’s idea of giving back is providing dresses for...

Facehunter Show Write Up on Tilzy.TV

Listen

No offense to Ambient Music Producers,...

Jesus, the stupid pretentious thing 21 year olds will tumbl at 4 o’clock in the morning....

Substance vs Style

I have really high standards for style, but I have a strong belief never to put style over...

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz

How many blogs are going to inform me that American Apperal is now selling the Hitachi Magic Wand? I...

The Internet Doesn't Want Me To Read

As this is my summer of self improvement, I’m on a book reading kick right now, or trying to...

Postcards From My Mama

My mother spends a lot of time on the telephone, to the degree where sometimes I wonder if she feels...

Presented by Simon Doonan

The Bravo A-List awards have taken fake awards show product tie-in advertising to a whole new level....

Progress

Tweaked my résumé! Expect a few cover letters to be written in a few weeks or so!

I Will Be Well Read

On one hand, I haven’t tinkered with my resume since I graduated last month. On the other hand...

Prepare to be TizRolled all Summer

Rumoured Nose Job AIDS victim Ashley Tisdale is releasing a cover of Ricky Astley’s...

Twitter? I guess so.

Skitch will revolutionize the way in which we annoy each...

Listen

Meter Made

Not that I’m apt to believe in such things, but maybe the fact that every meter I’ve...

This is the best job hunting advice I’ve recieved....

International Noise Conference, 2008.

I just hope Obama can win the whole...

The Republicans, in my opinion, decided on their best shot at winning the whole thing in November,...

Creeping Myself Out

Due to the long gap in my tumblr usage there are posts from January on the front page, and this one...

Limited Edition Pixelated Humping Neon...

Too many bands now mistake cultivating an image for starting lifestyle brands and give up on the...

WINK WINK

Thanks to the magic of LinkedIn contact importing I just learned that exactly three years ago to the...

Jackie

BRB, Buying Exlax and Peroxide

ptb: if you stopped eating for like two months and didn't move so all of your muscles went away you would look like a masculine version of agyness deyn with brown hair tbj
me: that is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me

SPF Cures Cancer

iruniran: I hope Britney Spears gets better and then delivers a scathing indictment of society at next year's vmas
megustanmuchos: lol that would be great
megustanmuchos: and i hope kevin is found out for drugs and prostitutes and she gets the kids forever
iruniran: and then Sean Preston cures cancer
megustanmuchos: lol
megustanmuchos: no i think he has slight downs
megustanmuchos: Jayden wil
iruniran: jayden will find the cure for slight downs, and then sean preston will cure cancer
megustanmuchos: lol

“Hey, how hung do you think Ian Curtis was?”
—  unintentional, morbid...

Simplicity Often Leads To Frustration

Apparently Tumblr edits the time stamp out. Which is unfortunate because the point of the last...

Horrible Joke, Amazing Comic Timing

art: there is this place that sells versace boxer briefs
art: but they only have XL
art: im like wtfffffffff
kyle: for fat man
art: i know
art: for elton john obviosly
kyle: like elton john
kyle: ahahaha
art: amazing

“Way I see it, America needs a president who’s gonna...”
— “Jimmy Carter” in...

On JLo's Coat

kristen: everyone says that coat is H&M but i aint neva saw it. Its probably only good for anarexies and pregs
iruniran: the two natural states of hollywood stars

“In a statement, Mr. Obama did not acknowledge defeat and...”
—  New York Times. Hey, not...

Hillary Wins Nevada!

Well, if you can believe, it seems like I broke another iBook power cord. This is like number 7. I...

Facehunter, I LOVE you, but this is so not something that...

Karl Lagerfeld Lead Figurine available at Colette.

from whorecons, some sort of heavan.

Me with Anna Wintour’s hair.

Hey Kyle
Hi Arturdo
Why am I a turd?
Because I want you in my butt.

I just read that, and there is no reason that needs to be immmortalized anywhere, but  for future...

ok so did you hear that cloverfield is supposed to be like the worsr
worst
really?
yea
i'm not at all surprised
i saw the monster thing did you?
the whole movie is people running around with a handheld camera yelling "DID YOU SEE IT? ITS GONNA GET US"
no
i heard its stupid looking
yeah
wtf it's not dinosaurs from space
my thought was that the dinosaurs from space concept was green lit when snakes on a plane looked like it was gonna be huge
and then when that failed they decided to keep it a secret
lol
but obviously they kept it a secret b/c it sucked

I want to post chat trasncripts, because I know that everyone loves to read those, but I can’t...

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ploop

unh

chew

hi